Interesting dream of mine

So. It's official: Richard Horvitz has inadvertently invaded my dreams.

I was at some sort of school in this dream and I was in line to get some food from the cafeteria. The line was incredibly short, probably only four people in it, counting my mom and me. There were about five people who appeared to be working there, most were female but there was one male.

As I waited in line, I heard the male speak a few times, and I thought he sounded familiar, but he didn't say enough for me to be sure. I got out of the line and watched him. Then he laughed loudly at something one of his co-workers said and said something I don't recall.

"OH MY GOD, YOU'RE RICHARD HORVITZ!" I ran up to the guy, who looked surprised.

"Huh? No, I'm not...who's he? The name sounds kinda familiar, though," he replied to me. I was disappointed that it wasn't really Horvitz, but I was still amazed nonetheless.

I explained some things to the guy and he looked interested, though a little doubtful. I asked him if he ever considered taking up voice acting.

"No, I couldn't do that. You see, I can do these voices, but I can't do them with any emotion," he told me. I wasn't shaken, however, and kept at it.

"Well, you could always take an acting class. With some training, you could be, like, a fantastic Richard Horvitz impersonator," I encouraged him, though now that I'm awake I'm wondering what the world would need two Richard Horvitzs or one Richard Horvitz and a Horvitz impersonator for.

So, I took him by the hand and took a walk with him, talking with him about various things and trying to come up with suggestions of what kind of acting classes he could take. I remember thinking about Doug J., my acting teacher at the WCT, but I wasn't too sure about having this grown man be taught by an actor that normally teaches children.

Here's a reminder: Though it's easy now to think of logical alternatives or answers for this man, I was sleeping. Earth logic does not apply to dreams.

So, that was basically my dream. There was a little more to it, parts I don't really know how to describe because it's hazy. I do remember that sometime after the Horvitz-guy left, I met Ryo Hayakawa and she needed to help interpret Japanese for this group.

...A very strange dream. I'm kinda disappointed that this Horvitz-esque man was nameless. I'm kinda disturbed that in my dream I went to such lengths of talking with guy just because he was similar to a man I'd like to meet. And that this similarity went about as far as his voice and not much else.

Lack of sleep messes with my personality.

So, here I am. The day after my new Church's Senior Banquet.

It was nice, but because of the bowling, I didn't get home until around 12:30 AM. Then I took a shower to get most of the hair spray out of my hair,'cause otherwise I would've woken up with an allergic reaction that would've probably thrown my immune system off.

I don't regret last night, it was fun. But when I'm tired, my personality seems to be off and it darkens a bit. A little more anti-social than normal, even with people I like...and I've been reading Invader Zim fanfics all day. The one I'm reading right now is about Zim getting addicted to a fictional drug.

If I wasn't in this mood, I probably wouldn't be reading it. I think normally wouldn't care for, "Someone messing with a characters personality and having them do something dumb like taking drugs." I could be wrong; I really don't know, I just now that I'm a bit off at the moment.

At least the author is good. I strongly disagree with some of her opinions (like her opinions on cutting, as seen in her fic about Gaz starting to cut as a way of couping with her confusion on the way to identifying herself as asexual). No matter, she's an excellent writer. She picks tough subjects and writes them well.

My arms hurt from bowling last night; I know this for a fact, because I mimicked the action of throwing a bowling ball with my right arm, and my arm goes into extreme pain. Well, maybe not extreme. Let me over-exaggerate, will you? I just know my arms are exceedingly sore. Damn muscle issues.

Back to reading that story. I just kinda wanted to relate that I get weird when I'm tired.

"Life can be lived, life can be loved...alone."

[Last music played: Learn to be Lonely sung by Minnie Driver]
[Current mood: Contemplative]

I've been feeling a little more depressed lately. Probably a mix between Tim being home and me adjusting and trying to get over Casey. I've been working on math this morning when I randomly thought of the Phantom of the Opera, more specifically Learn to be Lonely.

In short, I've let me console myself with emo-ness this morning, but I'm starting to feel a bit better.

I've realized that I seem to get myself stuck in situations of unrequited love. I know I'm young, but I can be very serious; so even if it's just a crush, I take it seriously and get ahead of myself. That makes it all the more disappointing when my dreams are crushed. I get stuck in similar situations that have nothing to do with love, also.

My characters are definitely facets of myself. When I was listening to Learn to be Lonely, I imagined my character, Ahikam, crying softly. Not into a pillow sobbing, just standing there listening to the music like I was and coming to a similar realization: "I have to learn to live alone." Just standing there with tears streaming slowly down his cheeks.

This is where I've realized that Ahikam seems to be my outcast, somewhat emo muse, while Melki is my, "pissed at the world and its stupidities, ever angry at how moronic human beings continue to be." Layla muse is similar to Melki muse, but instead just gets angry at specific people and lets those she loves near her, though she's still rather bitter.

I guess those three characters show the most negative aspects of my persona. Yay for me.

Unintentional hilarity

I love how my previous post almost makes it sound like I have a crush on Richard Horvitz. 'Cause not only does his name come after the tags, "crushes, feelings," but I was talking about "stalking" someone on a forum.

Now that I'm postively sure that the someone I was actually talking about has no idea where my blog is, I'll be blunt.

I was talking about a guy-friend of mine, Casey. Pretty much since I've met him, I've had a bit of a thing for him. I've come to the conclusion that he's not for me, it seems we keep disagreeing on some things. That may not seem like such a big deal, but in addition he has girls all over him. Girls are always falling for him and he's told me that he has four "wives". I know he's big on inside-jokes and stuff, but...

I guess I just realize that I shouldn't crush on someone who's not seriously considering me. I mean, why should I be seriously considering him if he's stated that he doesn't believe in "long-distance relationships." Pfft, we live in the same state and could probably see each other every week easily if we both commited to going to Madision to visit each other.

I think I'm coming off as a little angery, but I'm not. It's more like, I know I should get over him because nothing can and will ever happen, but I'm frustrated with myself that I ever had a thing for him. I wouldn't be in this mess if I had never toyed with the idea.

I guess such as life. I'm a stupid teenager, I shouldn't surprise myself so much when I make stupid mistakes. But I do anyway, apparently.

I caved into my fangirlish wants and started to write up an outline for my idea for an Invader Zim fanfic. I'm determined to try to make it as close as I possibly can to what a real Invader Zim episode would be like, based upon feel and characterization. I just don't want to write something highly unprobable, like Zim and Dib romance or Zim suicidal angst. It's amazing how easily I forgot the shortcomings of fandom, how people seem to have no concept of what their favorite characters truly are. Or have absolutely no concept of the world that these characters reside in.

Bleh. I could go on for practically forever, but for the sake of trying to remain brief, I'll stop. Tim, no pointing out the lack of brevity in my rant. I know that brevity is not exactly a strong point of mine. So...be nice? Please?

"It's like he's trying to speak to me, I know it."

I think I'm finally starting to listen to what God's been trying to tell me...

He's not the one for me. Yes, he's nice, smart, and amazingly intelligent...but almost every time I "stalk" him on that forum, I see him saying something I completely disagree with. It's like a red flag going off in my mind and I've been ignoring it up 'till now.

I love how incredibly blind teenage girls are when they are in love...and I was mocking myself, just to let those not familiar with my sense of humor/aren't reading my post in the tone I'm writing it in.

Now the fun part is to ignore my almighty hormones and stop flirting with this guy, stop entertaining ideas of things that will never be. Yay, I'm doomed!

I have to be going to the 4-H archery shoot soon. If I'm good, I'll get a white like I did last year. If I'm amazingly fantastic, I'll get a red. I'm rooting for getting a white, personally.

Speaking of 4-H, I came up with an idea. I'll keep it at this: It involves 4-H, Richard Horvitz, and me contacting our youth agent so I can figure out how to write a letter to Horvitz's agent.

...I was going to be vague about that and I ended up being oddly specific. Sometimes, I just fail at ambiguity.

"I am a perfectly normal human worm baby."

[Current music: ZIM-phony]
[Current mood: busy, content]

I have various happy things to note.

For starters, I only need $27.40 more monies before I have $249.99, AKA the Wii's retail price. Once I get my next paycheck from my job, I'll have a little more than enough. I'll be getting my next paycheck in two weeks.

I have re-gotten into Invader Zim. I believe I have a greater appreciation for it now than I did when it originally aired. I'd say this is mostly because I have gotten older and am therefore most likely smarter than I once was. After I obtain my Wii and get Twilight Princess, I believe I'm going to purchase the Invader Zim DVD boxset and the special House box.

I have once again accomplished in doing all of my required school hours. Take that, education-system! I shall conquer you yet!

I'm also working on my character bios. I've ended up tweaking around quite a bit, realizing how much I needed to figure out the time line of things. Like, how old characters are in relation to each other, when specific events happened to each character, and overall how these time lines properly overlap. Listening to ZIM-phony while figuring out this stuff is nice; no lyrics to distract me, and I can concentrate. I should do this more often.

Despite all these awesome things, I still can't wait for Tim to be home. I've missed him. I miss Josh, too, but I talked to him today, so it's pretty okay.

So, in short, I'm not dead yet. Sorry to disappoint any of my enemies. ((I suppose the real question is, "do I even have any enemies?" Other than Brittany, but I don't even know if she still hates me like she used to.))

Well, better get back to work. As a random note, hierarchies based upon height amuse me greatly.

Good news

No, I didn't just save a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico.

I'm shocked and amazed, by I managed to pull off the 28 hours.

Sure, I worked all morning...and hated it. But I did it.

Now I shall go off somewhere and wonder WTH I'm gonna do with the rest of my day.

All work and no play makes Acey a bored girl

So, yeah. Starting last Sunday I am supposed to put in 28 hours of school work a week.

For me, it's hard. And annoying. I'm trying, but I don't think I'm gonna make the goal.

I mean, yesterday I worked until 5:40. Just to make the five hours. Not to mention, I was concentrating so hard I was getting a headache. I wasn't sure if it had to do with my concentration plus the music, but I didn't want to turn off the music, because it was the main thing that was keeping me from just giving up completely due to boredom.

...Other than that, I'm trying to leave a happy life at the moment. I only need roughly 90 more bucks until I have enough for the Nintendo Wii.

Mom bought Silent Witness, a book about Terri Schiavo's circumstances, a couple of days ago from a dollar store. I picked it up, and I'm almost done reading it. It's well-written, I've only skipped a couple of pages because the author went on a large tangent describing autopsies, so I was surprised yet not surprised that this book was selling for a dollar.

When you think about it, it doesn't matter if it was a well-written book. People stopped caring about Terri Schiavo and her case two months after she died. And now, two years after her death, I'm reading this book. And only because Mom bought it from a dollar store.

Tonight, I'm going to Fun World, because it's Awana Book Finishers' Night. I hope we do laser tag. And I hope I can win a lot of tickets to either buy something silly for myself or to help another girl get what she wants.

I should start getting ready for school. Toodles.