Stuff starting to get back to normal

Tim's been doing better. I think, anyways. I haven't beaten him up yet, I think I haven't yet found the heart to do so. Err, or would it be that I haven't yet found the lack of a heart to do so?

I feel tired. Yesterday was busy, but a lot of good things happened.

I started working on my silly sewing project for 4-H, it probably won't take that long. I just hope to God that there won't be any hand sewing. Geez, I hate hand sewing. I watched a little bit of Invader Zim while I was finishing cutting out some pieces, and then pinning stuff together. I was mostly listening to the episodes. I'm not sure, but I think I got up to Walk of Doom.

I met with Maria yesterday to talk about my idea. Apparently, I won't be just hopping into my idea. It makes perfect sense, though, because I first need to figure out what the heck I'm doing, find out what works, what doesn't, etc.

Another problem Maria mentioned is that kids my age wouldn't care to listen to adults talk about their careers, even if it is interesting. Because it's not a concern for them, they don't have "omg I need a career path" staring at them in the face, these kids just plain aren't thinking about what they want to do in their future. So, before I can offer this solution to my peers, give them an idea of what they may want to do--or what they certainly don't want to do--I need to let them know that this is something that they should be thinking about. If I can get them to start thinking this way, I can get my idea to work and to be useful.

And only then will my quest for world domination truly begin. Buwahaha.

...Not really. I just had to add that last sentence because I was getting kinda serious and sounded smart or something. Pshaw.

But, anyway, about my idea? Maria said I need to start small. If I can get my "pilot project" to work, then I can go bigger. I'll learn how to make things run more smoothly. Also, once I get that experience people will be more trusting of me that I can actually do this.

I want to get back working on writing my story, but it seems I've hit a bit of writer's block. I haven't written for Layla in such a while that I'm sort of at a loss of what she would say. Either that or all of my characters have fled me because of my current infatuation with a certain marvelous voice actor. But, eh, I've always been a tad obsessive, so why would that make a difference now?

OH! I saw Ratatouille last night. It was amazing! I have to agree with my brother that there was one part where it wasn't as great. To say without spoilers, Remy is talking with his dad towards the beginning of the end of the movie and gets all philosophical and crap. It was kinda random and a bit cheesy. However, that's a small moment, and the rest of the movie was just great. Simply beautiful.

Eh. I was going to put a rant here about how Pixar is truly great and is nice compared to other animation companies that are convinced that animation is for kids. But the way I was writing it, I was starting to make an ass of myself, so I'm too lazy to fix it and make it sound better. I know how disappointed you all must be, but I'm afraid it's for the best.

Today is better

Tim is much better today. I think now he's really upset with himself that he tried to do this. I'm just glad that he isn't dead.

I'm still kinda mad at him though, but I'm too concerned about him to actually maul him like I kinda want to. I even told him last night that I'll beat him up later.

So, on another note...

I got my Invader Zim DVDs on Tuesday, way before this mess erupted yesterday. I love it and I'm glad I got the house box, too.

I was surprised, 'cause when I first saw the box, I thought it looked just somewhat crappy, but when I picked it up I could just immediately tell how sturdy it was. It's a really, really good quality collector's box! Mom laughed at me when she saw it; no surprises there, but it doesn't matter, 'cause I don't exactly care for Mom's opinion of entertainment or geekiness (OMG CHARMED!).

Tim could fully appreciate the box for what it's worth. He, too, was a little skeptical when it saw it, but as soon as he touched it he understood how cool it was.

I talked to Casey last night, since I needed to talk to someone. We talked about a bunch of things, about Tim...I tried not to dwell on that too much, so we talked about some other stuff. Like how Casey finally watched the first episode of Invader Zim, and he liked it. Perhaps I have succeeded in converting another! I can only hope.

If it turns out that Casey really likes the series, I'll probably end up buying it for him as a birthday present or something.

Tomorrow I meet with Maria about my idea for a 4-H event. I hope it'll go over well and that my idea isn't too vague. I don't want her to be disappointed that I don't have everything figured out...then again, I'm not sure she's expecting me to.

Well, off for school. Ugh, I better not do this again. I'd like to actually enjoy my summer next year to the fullest, actually be able to do practically nothing for a couple of months.

I...

...am at a loss.

My brother attempted suicide by medication overdose today.

I just don't know what to do.

Just a convo with my friend

Tsumirechan (5:41:54 PM): FANGIRLS ARE CREEPY DDDDD:

ConfusedMeNot (5:43:27 PM): D;

ConfusedMeNot (5:43:53 PM): I would like to meet Jhonen, and tell him that he's pretty awesome.

Tsumirechan (5:44:12 PM): Frankly

Tsumirechan (5:44:24 PM): I think meeting Jhonen would be shweet

Tsumirechan (5:44:45 PM): But I have nothing to say to him other than, "I love yer stuff, thank yous"

Tsumirechan (5:44:55 PM): So, I just feel like I might be a bother

Tsumirechan (5:45:13 PM): Then again, I'm not trying to abduct his panties, so he might not be bothered by me

ConfusedMeNot (5:45:32 PM): yeah, exactly

Hedgebunny of DOOM (Dream)

I was lying in our mini-van, in the middle seat. I was tired, not feeling well at all. I just wanted to be left alone.

My mom and my brother, Tim, came to me to ask what was wrong. Trying to get them to leave me alone, I saw that a live, moving bunny made of hedges had jumped in the car since Mom and Tim had the door open. I shooed it out of the car and closed the side car door.

For some reason my family continued to pester me. I noticed that one of the back windows were open. As I gazed through the small crack of the window, I saw the hedgebunny jump right through it and back into the car. I was a little freaked out.

I shooed the hedgebunny out of the car once again, only to have it instantaneously jump back in the car through the window. I couldn't take anymore of this.

I ran to the blue house, my former home, with my mom and my brother. I got in unscathed and Tim was right behind me. However, I saw that the hedgebunny was attacking Mom. I tried to think that she would be fine as I closed the door to the house and ran upstairs to Tim's bedroom.

At this point, I was so terrified, I felt it was pretty much every man for himself. I did care about what happened to my mother and brother, but they were in charge of their own survival.

Once I got to my brother's room, I stood on something to get closer to the ceiling. I removed a tile from the ceiling, squeezed in through the gap, and began to navigate through the strange tunnels that were there.

I kept crawling forward, thinking I was going to such a secretive place that no one could find me, especially not the hedgebunny. It was dark around me, everything was primarily brown in color. When I found the secret room, I plopped on the bed that was there. My heart was pounding.

And then I heard something coming up through the tunnels I had just been through.

It was the hedgebunny.

Will I ever stop talking about Richard Horvitz on my blog?

Who knows.

Short comment relating to him today, though:

I love Squirrel Boy. Hearing Richard hiss, "the precious" equals major win. (For reference, this moment happened at the end of "Outta Sight")

This is where I point out that it continues to boggle me that so many people seem to detest Squirrel Boy. I've had many moments while watching the show where I crack up and rewind so I can watch the moment again (thank you digital cable). I really don't get why so many people, at least kids on TV.com, seem to dislike it. Maybe it's because it rather reminds me of some of the "classic" cartoons, when they didn't try to fool you into thinking it was cool or deep or anything of the sort.

Though, I will agree: Squirrel Boy's opening song sucks. A little ditty in the background, with characters from the show shouting, "Rodney!" Luckily, though, I realize that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover; or in this case, a cartoon by its opening animation sequence.

Today I got the Invader Zim keychain that I ordered. It's Zim in the Voot Cruiser, and I like it. I admit it's much, much larger than I expected, so I don't believe I will be putting it on my key-ring. I'll probably end up putting it on my backpack. Whatever I do, I'll find a use for it, 'cause it looks bloody brilliant.

I sent my proposal email to Maria H. It was about the idea I came up with for a 4-H event. Maria replied quickly, and she sounded thrilled. I have to figure out when I'm available next week, because she said, "I'd love to meet with you and discuss it." Next week because she said she's too busy this week. I have to get on figuring out my schedule.

But...after I finish watching Squirrel Boy. 'Cause I can be that lazy.

I'll go back to watching Squirrel Boy now. I can assure anyone reading this that I'm going to rewind once more before I finish watching the episode, because "the precious" line is that great. Either that or I'm extremely biased in some way. Meh.

Odd dream

So, I had a dream. Guess who was in it?

Right, Richard Horvitz. Probably because I watched those Jimmy Kimmel videos with Fred Willard off of Horvitz's website last night.

It was like an acting class or something. There were three teachers, Doug J., Richard Horvitz, and some other guy I don't remember. In fact, I'm not even sure if this third guy had a name.

Like acting classes have normally been for me, I was much older than most of the kids, by about four years or so. Also, for some reason, Megan M, my friend Tennessee, was there, but she wasn't in the class.

I don't really remember anything else other than some competition in the class that confused me, and some crazed fan disrupting class by barging in to get Richard's autograph. He, of course, was all nice about it.

Am I officially crazy now? First, a couple of weeks ago, I have a dream with some Richard Horvitz sound-alike, who wasn't actually Richard. Now, I had a dream with the real Horvitz in it.

Yep, I'm definitely crazy. Thankfully, though, in the dream I wasn't spazzing over him or anything.

Anger isn't a disease

It's a choice.

Stress is high in my house at the moment. Tim's stressed over his job and Mom's stressed over Tim being stressed. I'm getting stressed because there's too much friggin' stress.

Fun, innit? I'm praying my hardest to God. I could only end up making the situation worse by getting angry out of my stress and yelling at someone in attempt to relieve myself.

This tight feeling in my chest isn't anything new; I've felt it before. It hurts, it's consuming, it scares me.

The only thing I can hope God can do through me is keep me mellow and not agitate my family any more.

Here's hoping I can manage to write some of my story today; either actually in the story or start and complete Basil's and Levi's character bios.

Yay, I no longer have any concept of time!

So. I got up, figured I was going to be doing school today. Like normal. I'd put in my three hours and maybe some extra to catch up from when I got a little behind earlier this week.

I procrastinated, reading a fanfic pretty much from the moment I woke up.

I decided, after getting to chapter eleven of the twenty-some chapter story, that I should stop and start doing school. Before that, however, I wanted to check the status of my amazon.com order.

I checked, it didn't say anything different. The Invader Zim keychain from Old Glory is expected to arrive anywhere between June 18-25.

I was pretty sure that today was the 16th, since Gaia's monthly collectibles were unveiled yesterday. I hovered my cursor over the clock in the lower right corner of the computer screen. Just imagine my surprise when I saw that it read Saturday, June 16, 2007.

I thought today was Friday. And I was sure that yesterday was Thursday.

It's definitely summer now; I no longer know what day of the week it is.

In other news...

I probably sounded a little too emotional or something in my previous post. I really wasn't, if anything I just felt really sympathetic.

So, right now I'm wearing my one tank top. It feels weird and I've decided that I'll never go out in this thing until I buy a strapless bra and figure out a thorough, quick way to shave my pits. I don't think I'm going anywhere today, so I'm fine with wearing it. If I'm mistaken, I have a load of my laundry in the wash, so no worries.

So, I have a little story. This happened two days ago when I went to the Milwaukee Zoo with my brother, Tim. I shall call this tale...

Acey, Saver of Hats

It was around three o' clock in the afternoon and I was exhausted. I had went to the zoo so I could take pictures of the animals and maybe enter some of the photos in the county fair. After having been at the zoo for about two and a half hours, my brother and I had finally finished looking at all the exhibits.

We had just left the monkey exhibit, much to my pleasure. Heading towards the zoo's entrance, I had just finish telling Tim how tired I was from walking around for two hours. He insisted that I was out-of-shape, but I didn't feel like arguing.

A gust of wind blew. Clenching onto my camouflage-colored hat, I kept walking forward. I was especially surprised at myself with how I had dressed that day. I was wearing my light pink Mori no Ike t-shirt, my camouflage Awana hat, and dark-blue jeans, all the while carrying my leather, brown purse and a camera case. If anything, I looked like a normal somewhat girly-girl.

One of the tour trams passed by and a strange yet oddly familiar scene played out before me. Toward the front of the tram was a mother and her young girl, who looked about three or four years old. As they passed, a tiny, white hat fall to the ground. When I looked back at the tram, I could see the distress in the mother, realizing that she could not leave the tram while it was in motion to get the hat. The tram driver would not stop, either.

My heart panged in confusion for a few seconds before settling on a decision. Pushing my stuff to Tim as I asked him to hold it, I ran over to the hat, picked it up, and sprinted down the road to where the tram had just gone.

The fatigue I had complained about earlier was superseded by my goal to rescue the hat and return it. I saw the mother waving at me as I approached closer and closer; she knew I had the hat.

When I was finally near enough, I reached out the hat to the mother, who took it gratefully.

"Wow, thank you!" she exclaimed to me. I just grinned in response, letting my legs slow from their sprint to a stop.

Instantaneously, after I was done, I jogged back to my brother. Once I reached him, I felt the weight of my weariness sit on me. We walked and talked our way back to where our car was parked, with me noting how wet my pants felt with sweat.

Because of all this, I thank God for the glorious Qdoba Mexican Grill. Nothing tastes better after rescuing a hat for a little girl, who reminds one of one's own self.

Hell hath no fury compared to mine own

So. It's amazing how I am always late to learn information that's been out for a while.

I didn't realize that Nickelodeon Studios had closed. I went to Universal Studios this January, and I didn't know that Nickelodeon Studios was gone. It's at times like these that I wish I was a little more observant.

I normally wouldn't care if it weren't for me seeing the time capsule. As soon as I saw that, I felt disappointed. Why? Because the hopes of children were...smashed, I guess. The kids of '92 who made suggestions for that time capsule thought that it was going to be buried in Nickelodeon Studios and then re-opened, fifty years later, from the very spot it was originally placed.

I guess I just felt bad that it seems many times, no matter how small or large the issue, things tend not to turn out how we expected. I don't really know why, but little things like this...upset me. I guess it's just the child in me sympathizing with other children.

But, I'm not actually angry. I'm just a nerd and thought that the title sounded cool.

I'm bright...like a dying lightbulb...

So, I was talking with my mom. She was telling me how from the military records she looked up yesterday, she found that I had two ancestors that were a part of the revolutionary war. Because of this, I can apply for scholarships from Daughters of the Revolutionary War.

But the important part of the conversation was this:

Mom: And [the two ancestors] both come from the state of... *leaves me hanging to get me to guess*
Me: ...Wisconsin?
Mom: Revolutionary war, Amanda.
Me: Uh...Philadelphia?
Mom: Which is... *goes on, telling me that I guessed wrong*
Me: ...Pennsylvania?
Mom: That's right! And Amanda, Philadelphia is a city, not a state.
Me: *laughs* How am I supposed to remember whether Philadelphia is a state or city?

The moral of this story is:
I fail at geography.